Cross Breeds

I've had a fear of horses ever since i was thrown? can i get over it? PLEASE ANSWER!?

so, my mom is horse crazy. at the time, i liked them, but i wasnt all out crazy. she entered me in 4-H, for horse classes in the exabition. our old horse got arthritis (spelling?) and we retired him, and our other horses arent trained enough. so we leased a retired race horse throughbred mare for the exabition. the practicing was fine, but when we got to the show, she was terrified. (i've ridden horses and shown them many times btw) (Her name was Symone) 10 minutes before my first class, i was out riding her around practicing, and i guess that being back at a show made her feel like she was back at a race track. and this really un-experienced horse girl came galloping her horse up behind me, and made Symone think it was a race. i held her back, so she started full out bucking. i eventually fell off. i got a concussion from the fall, and spent the next 6 hours in an ambulance, hospital room, and bed, being treated for s spinal fracture ( that i did not have). this all terrified me. i know people have had a lot worse falls, been killed and stuff from horses and have had the courage to get back on, so im pretty wimpy. but its been over 3 months since i have ridden. my mom wants me back in 4-H, (my opinion doesnt matter) and she got me another horse. i know that this horse is 'supposedly' a lot better than Symone, but i feel sick when i even think about getting back on at the EX. can i get over this fear? I've even had nightmares of this new horse bucking me off at the Ex, and i can't take it. my mom wont listen. its haunting my dreams? can this be stopped?

Public Comments

1. I hear you! my dad have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and he has had it ever since he came out of the Vietnam war. He still to this day has nightmares about his time in the war. But when he first came home it was terrible, so he starting seeing a counselor and it all got better very soon. So all i'm saying is if you are having trouble you should probably talk to someone. It could just be that you got traumatized so now you are having these awful back flashes. So I would highly consider talking to someone about it! Hope I helped!(: Just saying if it's a good horse you should trust it. Because the possibility of getting injured on a horse is about a 1 out of 10 chance :)
2. I don't know. Can you? Personally I think you should just tell your mom straight up that horseback riding isn't something you want to do (you said you don't really have an opinion so you probably don't care if you get your courage back). Why waste your time and money then?
3. If you don't enjoy riding nobody can force you to get on a horse. Its all about WANTING to. You can't get over your fear if you do not want to ride. However if you do love horses and want to start riding again, i would start on a really calm horse, and maybe just get someone to walk you around on a lead line for a while, then lunge line ect. Just remember accedients happen in the horse world, but if you love it enough you will take that chance. And just because it happened once does not mean it will happen everytime you ride.
4. I think that you just need to take things really slow and town down your riding for now. Make sure you tell your mom your not ready and that whether you show or not is up to you. As for riding this new horse, like I said, start out slow. If you need to ride with someone leading you at the walk, do so until you feel comfortable. Work on it slowly, building up your confidence one step at a time. Don't push yourself too far too fast. Get back to your normal riding self as you see fit.
5. You have to suck it up and do it. Do you even like riding? If you don't, then tell your mom. She shouldn't be forcing you to ride. But if you really do love riding, then you'll just suck it up and get back on.
6. Honestly before this accident occurred you should have told your mother straight up that you are not interested in riding or participating in horse competitions like she does. There is nothing worse than a parent living through their child. You need to stand up to your mom calmly and tell her how you feel using an "I" statement. Secondly to get over any fear is to put yourself in the situation and be exposed to it. As the expression goes, "Fall off a horse and get right back on immediately." All you can is start over at the basics with horses. Do lots of ground work. Lead this new horse around. Lunge the horse to do join up. When you are lunging and see the the horse licking/chewing and turns towards you this means the horse has accepted you and is willing to follow you. Groom the horse daily. Ride. Re-take riding lessons to get a refresher course and to help you get rid of your fear of horses. Maybe get your mom to set up an appointment for you with either a psychologist or a therapist to help you with the nightmares. I would also say try meditating before you go to bed at night. Take a few deep breaths and think positive. Don't let it affect you. Keep a dream journal/diary next to your bed and record your nightmares that you have at night and what happens to you during the day. Remember to take it slow and easy. Hope it works out for you.
7. Do you WANT to get back into riding, or do you just do it because Mom says so? If you want to ride again, just do it. Don't think about it. Block out your fear and swing your leg over the saddle. If riding just isn't your thing, then you shouldn't be forced to do it. It's totally wrong on your mom's part to make you ride. She needs to get that through her head. You wouldn't be doing anything wrong by straight-up telling your mother that you don't want to do it.
8. i know you are scared and anxious, but in truth sometimes the only way to stop the nightmares and get past something is to face it. you don't have to go out and get full blown into riding/showing, but start taking baby steps to reclaim your confidence to move past what happened. start spending time around the horse on the ground brushing it, cleaning the stall, and so on. after a little while tack it up and lead it around and see how you feel. do it several times over time and maybe your anxiousness will come down to a level you can control. then try having someone hold the horse and just mount up and sit on the horse. if you are still ok have them lead you around. just work your way slowly, but don't give up. even if you decide you truly don't want to ride it should be a decision you make based on how you really feel, not based on fear.
9. Your mom SHOULD have had better sense than to put you on an ex race horse.Some of them are good horses, but many have problems.Thorobreds tend to be an excitable breed anywayI had a16.5 hand thorobred race track reject.We won 2nd in cavalry competition in a field of 32.This does not mean he did not have his crazy moments.EX racers are for very experienced riders with the temperment to MAKE them obey.Riding to Hell[hospital] in a stainless steel box[ambulance] is bad but get over it! .Insist on a gentle well trained horse and DO IT